Shareware Agreement

So, how does the Ticket Assassin work? It’s pretty easy, it’s just these four steps:

  1. Read the Put a Hit on Your Ticket page, which explains how to write a challenge.
  2. Read theShareware Agreement (that’s below)
  3. Register on the registration page.
  4. Once I get your registration, I will will email you the materials you need to write your challenge. (If it’s nighttime or the weekend, you might have to wait a bit for me to get back to you)
  5. Print it, sign it, send it.

That’s it.

The process of writing your challenge is explained on the Put a Hit on Your Ticket page. Trust me, it’s not rocket science. If you can write a letter, then you can write a traffic ticket challenge. I recommend reading that page before you register.  To give yourself the best chance of success, you need to understand your right to a Trial by Written Declaration before proceeding.

Now, onto the Shareware Agreement:

Shareware Agreement

PLEASE READ THIS! I promise it is not that boring and it explains the process.

  1. What is the TicketAssassin Shareware?
  2. The Registration Agreement
  3. Registration and Membership
  4. Payment Instructions

1. What is the TicketAssassin Shareware?

My TicketAssassin Shareware is an arsenal of forms, examples and guidelines I’ve assembled to help you fight your ticket via Trial By Written Declaration, a process you can do entirely by mail. This collection includes specific court documents needed to contest your case, dozens of examples, and comprehensive, easy-to-follow directions and guidelines for their proper use.

My Shareware will help you construct the best possible argument in the shortest amount of time. It will help you in your fight to win your case.

Why is this “shareware”? I call it shareware because, like any shareware, it is provided to users without payment on a trial basis.

2. Registration Agreement

My Shareware is only available to those who have registered on my registration page. When you register, I will e-mail you a registrants-only link to my Shareware. This is a courtesy extended in good faith to all new members. I trust in the honesty and good will of our members to pay their membership fee per our agreement.

By registering, you send me specific information about your ticket. I need this info in order to send you additional declaration examples that are not in the Shareware databse.

By registering, you agree to pay the $25 membership fee within 10 days of registration.

3. Registration and Membership (what you get for your $25 donation)

TicketAssassin Member Benefits :

TicketAssassin Members get the following services for one year:

  • Access to my “Put a Hit on Your Ticket” Shareware example declarations, argument strategies and forms
  • Additional examples for your particular violation (these will be emailed to you)
  • Expert answers to your questions with detailed guidance on contesting your ticket via mail, including all necessary court forms
  • Detailed Examples of successful written declarations for the most common moving violations: speeding tickets, stop sign tickets, and red light tickets (including automated enforcement)
  • Priority E-mail access to me, the Ticket Assassin, as you fight your ticket. Since every case is unique, your ability to ask me questions about using my Shareware to fight your case is often vital to your success. Paid members have the best chance of winning: they get the best information and support and their karma is pure.

After* I receive your shareware fee, you will receive a Welcome email. Save it. This email contains a special, members-only email address, available exclusively to TicketAssassin Members. (Email sent to this address will be answered quickly (usually within a day).

* – If you’re paying at night, give us until the next day to send you your Welcome email. If it’s on the weekend, give us longer. We, too, have lives. 🙂

As a TicketAssassin Member, your membership fee supports my website. As such, I will support and encourage your fight to win your case. My twenty years of experience in fighting traffic tickets is at your disposal, including ongoing research into contesting strategies.

Ultimately, our registration agreement is based upon the Honor System and is enforced by your own good character, conscience and belief system, and will be enforced by Universal Karma.

Specific Reasons to
Honor our Shareware Agreement
for Various Faiths

Christians: Thou shalt not steal. We understand that this is one of the Ten Commandments, applicable to both Christians and Jews. To violate this commandment is a mortal sin. You might go to hell for that, unless you’re Catholic, in which case there is the possibility of Purgatory. Purgatory is a lot like Barstow, California: hot, boring, full of decrepit trailers. Enough said.

Jews: See above. Please be a mensch not a putz.

Hindus: Instant Karma’s gonna get you if you do not honor our shareware accord. You will reincarnate as a bacon double-cheeseburger eaten by a hillbilly. He will bite into your cooked flesh with bad teeth while he fantasizes about his cousin’s bodacious Ta-Ta’s. Remember, despite his many nimble arms, Ganesh was not a thief. Please follow his example.

Moslems: There is one god, Allah, and Mohammed is his prophet. Mohammed did not steal. Why should you?

Buddhists: The bad karma accumulated by theft will, at minimum, delay your Enlightenment. Do you want to reincarnate as a hell being or hungry ghost?

Agnostics: There may or may not be a God monitoring your conduct. Why risk it?

Atheists: Ok, so you believe that there is no God. You believe that man is a wise animal and should be judged by the sum of his actions and words. How do you want to be remembered: as a thieving dung-flinging monkey or as an honorable monkey like Dr. Zaius?

Paranoid people: We know where you live. And since you visited our site, we now know every site you visited before this one. Yes, we have your cookies, pervert. All we have learned about you will remain secret, as long as your honor our deal.

But seriously friends, if you don’t pay, I can’t continue to offer this service. I’ve spent a lot of time and expense and effort developing this website and creating these forms to help you fight your ticket. I hope that my Shareware encourages you and other Californians to contest their unfair citations easily and successfully.

Please support Ticketassassin.com by paying the membership fee when you register to use our shareware forms and site content to fight your ticket. Thanks for your support!

4. Payment Instructions

Where do I send the money?

You can pay by Paypal or by check.

BECOME A MEMBER NOW through Paypal:

NOTE: Memberships paid with PayPal will be processed within 48-72 hours (not 24 hours).

To pay by check or money order, please make it out to Patrick Mulroy (not “Ticket Assassin”) and send to:

TicketAssassin
P.O. Box 170665
San Francisco, CA 94117-0665

Again, checks MUST be made out to PATRICK MULROY. Any checks made out to Ticket Assassin will not be processed and shredded.

Be SURE to include your email address with your payment!

Note: Memberships paid with a check are only processed after receiving the check at our P.O. box (no exceptions).

Thanks for your support! 

 

Now, onto the Registration page!

Note: Keep registration descriptions BRIEF (no more than a paragraph, 4-6 sentences). If we need more information, we’ll contact you. Please do not register on the site more than once. If you are a paid member requesting additional examples past your first request, please email us a copy of your ticket for review. Membership is only for one person, we have to verify the ticket belongs to you and not someone else.